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Unlocking your true self: Cultivating personal virtues and skills (Part 5)

Unlocking your true self: Cultivating personal virtues and skills (Part 5)

Welcome to the fifth part of the blog post series, where you will gain clarity on the importance of consistency and being patient and compassionate with yourself, along with valuable techniques and strategies to embrace them. If you need a refresher on the techniques to practice selected virtues, principles, or skills, revisit the first part for fantastic guidance. 


Let’s continue exploring the skills, virtues, and principles that help you unlock your true self…

Use these reminders to optimise your technique practice:

Now that you are fully focused, let’s start exploring and practicing

Develop consistency

Why is it essential?

Consistency allows you to build momentum, stay motivated, and remain on track even when faced with challenges or setbacks. By maintaining consistent efforts, you foster a sense of progress and resilience, supporting your journey towards achieving your vision.

How to make the shift?

Set clear goals and create a roadmap

Celebrating progress is essential for maintaining motivation. To ensure you stay on track, regularly reflect on your current phase, which will provide clarity on how to advance. Ask yourself these key questions:

  • Do I have a vision that excites and inspires me every day? Your vision should be something that fuels your passion and keeps you motivated.
  • Have I clearly defined goals and a plan to achieve this vision? Ensure your plan includes specific, measurable milestones that translate your vision into actionable steps.
  • Am I deeply committed to my goals and vision? Assess whether you are willing to put in the effort and do your best to achieve them.

Understanding where you currently stand will help you identify your next steps. Are you in the phase of discovering your true vision, finding your driving force, creating a detailed plan or setting achievable milestones?

For in-depth guidance on each phase, consider exploring the Essential Package

Break free from distractions

Stay focused on what truly matters by eliminating both internal and external distractions. Distractions can pull your attention and energy away from your goals, so it is key to identify and address them.

  • When disempowering limiting self-talk arises, thoughts like “I am not enough. I will do it tomorrow. I am too weak. I am not clever enough. I don’t have the time. I don’t know the right people,” — remember that it is your “old self” (which you may call surface persona, ego, layers and facades) trying to hold you back. Notice it without judgment. Don’t suppress or react to it inside. Let it arise and pass without following it. At that moment, you stop feeding it with your energy, so it won’t renew or grow. Observe and notice how it makes you feel (for example stressed, uncomfortable, worried or sad). This is when you detach yourself from it by weakening the connection. You may find the best way to shift your focus and become present is to take a few deep conscious breaths. Turn your attention to your breathing as you inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. When you inhale, feel how your abdomen and chest expand, and then when you exhale, how they contract. Repeat this a few times. Then, it is your choice to shift your focus and continue with your presence and awareness. 

You can also ask yourself: “What if everything goes well this time?”

  • Learn to say no to external distractions. By setting boundaries and declining small demands on your time, you empower yourself to say yes to what truly matters. Your time is precious — don’t let anyone take it from you. Stay focused on your goals and prioritise your time and energy. When faced with uncertainty, ask, “How will I feel about this in 20-30 years?”

If you find it hard to say no, remind yourself that it is a natural part of life. Not everyone will share your direction or vision, and that’s perfectly fine. Some people will be on a different path because their goals differ. Meanwhile, others will stay by your side because they share your vision and goals. Embrace those who share your vision and let go of the rest.

To dive deeper, consider exploring your free session from the Essential Package. This session offers valuable insights, tools and techniques to help you reduce distractions, enhance your awareness, and keep your focus and energy on what truly matters – your goals. For comprehensive guidance, the full Essential Package may be the ideal fit.

Harness your energy for consistency

When you are energised, you are more inclined to engage in tasks and push yourself towards achieving your goals. This increased motivation enables you to stay focused and committed to your efforts, leading to more consistent performance.

The Essential Package provides insights into mastering the five key areas that elevate the quality of your present experience (state of being) and propel you towards your aspirations in fantastic ways. Discover the Essential Package here to find out more about its benefits and features.

Embrace flexibility and patience

Consistency is a journey of step-by-step progress, not a race. The more you practice, the easier and more natural it will become. Over time, your commitment to progressing toward your goals will help you build discipline. This discipline then becomes a habit, leading to greater consistency in all areas of your life.

Remember, progress isn’t always linear. There will be days when things don’t go as planned, when failures and mistakes occur, or when circumstances may change and unexpected challenges arise. Rather than getting discouraged, embrace these moments as opportunities to learn, improve, and make even greater progressBe willing to adapt and adjust your schedule or approach when necessary. Flexibility is key to staying on track.

Stay patient, keep going, and remember that every small step forward is a step closer to your aspirations. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small, and trust in the process.

Be patient and compassionate with yourself

Why is it essential?

You might think this is a repetition of the previous technique for consistency, however, discussing patience and compassion on their own is essential because they play a key role in your journey, rather than being a mere technique.

Pursuing your goals and vision is a journey, not a sprint. There will be ups and downs, plateaus and moments of frustration. Being aware of this and practicing patience and compassion will help you embrace the process and enjoy the journey. You will realise that this is not solely about the destination; rather, it is about the journey and discovering who you truly are beyond the surface persona (which you might call the ego, layers and facades, or conditioned habitual self). By appreciating the growth and learning experiences, you will be able to transform moments of feeling down, unmotivated, stressed or frustrated into stepping stones for opportunities.

How to make the shift?

Cultivate your awareness

This is a foundational step. It involves becoming aware of your thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, which is essential for practicing patience and self-compassion.

To practice being present and aware, consider integrating reflection into your daily routine, alongside techniques like Meditation, Yoga Nidra, T’ai Chi or Qigong. These practices help you identify and eliminate distractions, face your true self, and engage in honest self-reflection. How? They enable you to go beyond the layers and facades of your surface persona (which you might call the “old self,” ego, or conceptual habitual self). Through these practices, you connect with your true essence, face challenges, and embrace mistakes which are stepping stones and opportunities. 

By cultivating these practices, you build courage and confidence, stay focused on what matters most, develop the ability to turn things around, improve continuously, and amplify what is good and positive.

The Essential Package guides you through this process, equipping you with the right information, insights, techniques and strategies to gain clarity, face challenges, make a shift, bring your desires to life, and live a fulfilling life. Explore this opportunity and continue your journey!

Shift to empowering patterns

Once you are becoming aware and progressing step-by-step, you can start addressing and breaking the negative cycles or patterns that hinder your patience and compassion.

The beginning of your journey may seem and feel hard. You may want to quit, because you don’t see any results in a day or a week. Even afterward, you might find yourself thinking, “Why am I doing all this? I will never succeed. I don’t deserve love, a better job, good health, or financial stability. I’m not good enough. I’m a failure.” When you react and lose patience, you lose awareness and disconnect from the present moment. When this happens, you react to your “old habitual self” (which you may call surface persona, ego, layers and facades) and turn back to unconscious programs. Your mind becomes consumed by disempowering limiting or negative thoughts and expectations, leading to negative feelings of impatience, stress, anxiety and frustration. The more negative feelings you have, the more negative thoughts you generate, and this cycle continues until you break it

Let’s go through how you can break this cycle...

When you sense any disempowering, limiting or negative thoughts, concepts, or narratives generated by your inner self-talk, notice (become aware of) it without judging it. Remind yourself that it is your “old self” (surface persona, ego, layers and facades) trying to limit and hold you back. Do not suppress and do not react to it inside. Allow it to arise without following it. At that moment you stop feeding it with your energy, so it won’t renew or grow. Observe and notice how it makes you feel (for example stressed, uncomfortable, worried, sad). This is when you detach yourself from it by weakening, breaking the connection to it. To become present and make the shift, choose an activity that relaxes you and makes you forget about problems and worries. You may find the best way to shift away and become present is to take a few deep conscious breaths: turn your attention to your breathing as you inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. When you inhale, feel how your abdomen and chest expand, and then when you exhale, how they contract. Repeat this a few times. It is then your choice to shift your focus, for example, to your vision and the steps you will take to make progress toward it, while proceeding with your presence and awareness.

For more in-depth guidance, you may want to consider exploring the Essential Package.

Embrace the journey step-by-step

After cultivating awareness, it is important to embrace a gradual approach. Remind yourself that making the shift is not a one-time fix, a magic formula, a quick life hack; rather, it is about making steady, step-by-step progress. Commit to showing up for yourself every day, and recognise that each small effort contributes to your overall vision.

Celebrate even the smallest milestones along the way, as these incremental achievements build towards your vision. For example, if you are working on improving your productivity, a small milestone might be creating and following a daily to-do list. Similarly, if you are focusing on developing a healthier lifestyle, a small step could be incorporating a short walk into your daily routine.

When you notice yourself falling into disempowering limiting or negative thought patterns, use the previous technique to address and shift those thoughts and feelings. This practice helps you stay aligned with what truly matters to you and fosters ongoing progress.

Turn mistakes into stepping stones

After you have started to break negative cycles, changing your perspective on mistakes becomes more feasible.Instead of dwelling on what happened, shift your focus and ask supportive questions: What can I learn from this? How can I fix it? How can I make it better? If I knew how to resolve it / make it better / improve it, what would I do? What steps could I take to prevent this from happening again? If there were a way to achieve the desired result more effectively, faster, or efficiently, what would it be?

We have all made mistakes along the way, and we are at this point for a reason. Every one of us is writing the book of our life, which has its crumpled pages, mistakes and failures. Realise that they are the ones that helped you get to this point and gave you the opportunity to embark on your journey towards your desired life.

Patience in practice

Bringing patience into your interactions involves applying the cultivated awareness, gradual progress, and a fresh perspective into everyday scenarios.

To give you few ideas to practice:

  • Active listening: Make a conscious effort to listen fully to others without interrupting. This means focusing on their words, understanding their perspective, and responding thoughtfully rather than reactively. Active listening shows respect, fosters better communication and deeper connections.
  • Waiting: Whether you are in a long line at the grocery store or stuck in traffic, use these moments as opportunities to practice patience. Instead of getting frustrated, take a few deep breaths and shift your focus to the positive aspects of the situation. For example, you might use the time to plan your day, listen to an interesting podcast, or simply enjoy the present moment as awareness. By reframing these situations, you can turn potential sources of stress into chances for calm and awareness.
  • Supportive mentoring: When mentoring or teaching someone, recognise that learning and growth take time. Be patient with their progress and avoid rushing them. Offer encouragement, constructive feedback, and be prepared to repeat or rephrase information as needed.
  • Helping others: Approach their needs with empathy and understanding. Avoid letting impatience cloud your actions. Whether you are assisting with a task or offering emotional support, approach it with patience and compassion.

If you find yourself losing patience, remind yourself to pause and reassess. Use the techniques discussed above. Recognise the triggers that cause impatience and work on reframing your response to foster a more positive interaction.

You won’t be surprised to hear that everything starts with you. Your relationship with yourself is the most crucial one. If you don’t have love, compassion, empathy, respect, kindness, generosity and care for yourself, you won’t be able to genuinely give or receive these from others.

Practicing patience and compassion towards yourself will help you become more patient and compassionate with others. When you practice self-compassion, you become more aware of your own thoughts, beliefs, behaviours, and emotions. This heightened self-awareness enhances your ability to empathise with others. By being patient, you can then listen to others’ perspectives without rushing to judgment or interrupting them, which helps you better understand and connect with them. With this new perspective, empathy, and increased awareness, a beautiful side of life will open up for you

As you progress on your journey and embrace who you are by connecting with your true essence, you will find that striving to be your true self enables you to live authentically. Open and honest conversations with yourself and others will cultivate trusted and loving relationships, ultimately leading to a purposeful and fulfilling life.

What it means to live life this way can’t be fully explained with words; it must be experienced. Words can only point to it: when you live and “be” in the present moment and feel grateful for it, when you connect with your essence you recognise that love starts with you. When you love your self, you can genuinely receive and share love with others. When your relationships are built on trust and love, you feel whole and filled with energy. When you approach everyday tasks and challenges with patience, an open-mind, and curiosity. When you engage in your job and hobbies with love and excitement for the future. Love, in its many forms, acts as a binding force that enhances and amplifies all other virtues, skills, and principles, making it indispensable on your journey.

Be patient with yourself and commit to practicing consistently which will lead you to gain clarity, deepen your knowledge and realise, accept their truth. The Essential Package guides you through all the main areas, providing key information and a wide range of tools and techniques to cultivate and embody consistency and patience.

How will you incorporate patience and self-compassion into your daily life? What specific practices, like meditation or reflection, will you use to stay present and aware?

I would love to hear about your experiences with the techniques or versions you found most effective. If you have discovered any other useful tools not mentioned here, please share them. Your insights could be incorporated into future blog posts, helping to empower, inspire, and motivate others on their journey.







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